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Venture Capital - Friday, October 14, 2005

The Language of Venture Capital

We recently stumbled across a nifty resource on the website of 3i, the London-based venture and and private equity firm. It's a glossary of VC-speak.

British Humourists

According to 3i: The international venture capital and private equity industry has a language all of its own. To help beginners we have created a guide to the jargon. a:c readers can check it out here.

There's lots of interesting stuff here - and even a few quaint Anglo-VC expressions that elicited a chuckle or two:

Flagpole syndrome
Cynics say that when the chairman decides the company is important enough to have a flagpole in the car park it is a sure sign that the business is at the start of the slippery slope. (Sometimes known as the "crested-carpet" or "fountain-in-the-foyer" syndrome.)

Lemons, plums
Examples of words used in the financial world to sum up the success or failure of a business - lemons ripen fast on the tree, and investments which leave a bitter taste ripen faster than good ones. See also dog and pearl.

Spreadsheet jockey
A well-known character in modern business, who loves analysing performance figures for the sake or it, but his spreadsheets don't really add much to the sum of human knowledge.